Three Things I'm Grateful For

I started doing daily gratitude posts on Instagram over a year ago and it was the beginning of a new chapter. I created an Instagram account dedicated to mental, emotional and physical wellness and everyday, would post a picture (mostly selfies, lol) along with a list of three things I'm grateful for on my story. When I first started doing this, it was to help shift my mindset from negative to positive. I had just had my knee surgery, was having a very hard time mentally and wanted to try and give myself the best chance. I didn't have a (physical) community to lean on since I still considered myself fairly new to the area and hadn't really made friends yet, so a lot of what I was in need of came from virtual connections with my best friends back home, my parents and even my workout buddies I had made while doing home workouts back in 2020! All of whom played a part in checking in on me, keeping a constant connection and ensuring to pour into me, which I truly could never show enough gratitude for! This Instagram brought me a lot of likeminded people who were doing the same for themselves, creating a community of people to motivate and be motivated by!

Sometimes, I go back and check out all the posts I made to this account, check in on those I had connected with and remember where it was I had started because its humbling and a great reminder that I once was so much further back than compared to now and had I not put forth effort to move forward...I may still be back there today. Since I've taken a huge step back from social media, I don't post my three things I'm grateful for anymore but instead, speak them out loud every morning to myself or my dad (I call him on my way to work every morning) or I write them down in my journal I keep in my purse. I don't do this daily, but I do try to do it at least once a week. I do miss being able to inspire those on my social media to do the same, and reading their gratitude post! I loved being able to read messages from folks that said, "I look forward to these posts of your everyday!". Even though that brought such joy and positivity to me, I now am just so focused on feeding my soul organically, addressing the positive within my reality and relationships around me that I don't focus on what I miss about my old ways as much anymore. Instead, I'm focused on all the greatness that has come to me since the shift in my life, in real time. I'm attempting to use this blog as a way to connect with folks virtually but on a much more intimate level and I believe this is what I truly am meant for. For the goals that I have in my life right now, a more secluded and personal connection with people who truly care and are interested in anything that I have to offer is something so much more meaningful for me in this season of my life. Because of that, I am always going to be so appreciative of those who take the time to read my words and provide feedback because I know that it's intentional. That in itself, is such a blessing!

Anyways, to circle back to the main topic, the three things I'm grateful for! Currently, my gratitude is very centered around my work-home life balance, relationships and mental health. The following are the three things that I feel like I am most grateful for during this season:

1. Transparency

2. Faith

3. Evolution

Transparency is the first thing I truly am grateful for because the depth at which I've been able to achieve such transparency gets deeper and deeper as I experience life. I once believed I was as raw as I could get. There was nothing that could make me anymore direct an concentrated. I actually had no idea what I was even talking about, lol. With more life experience, more interaction with different people, the further transparent I'd become. Only life and its obstacles could allow me to open up myself to the point where no matter the angle you were looking at me from, no matter the relationship and its nature, I would be a similar figure to whoever was interested in observing. Being as forthcoming as I can possibly be is the goal everyday. I self evaluate at ever chance I get while I'm trying to obtain a new level of transparency and this too helps me with self-improvement. Not only do I desire to be a decent human, but one that is authentically myself and unashamed of that, no matter how it looks or is perceived. Being transparent with myself as well as those around me is very important to me and I hope that as I get older and continue life, the importance of transparency grows.

I can talk for hours about my faith and how big it truly is but I'll keep is short and to the point. The faith that I've developed over time shocks even me! I always knew that I am a child of the Most High and that I am saved only by His mercy but I never knew that my love and desire to pursue my on relationship with my Heavenly Father would be what it is today. I sort of had this idea that I would be saved by my father's salvation, lol. I say that because he is the most God fearing man I have in my life and I always grew up thinking that his faith was big enough for the both of us. This gave me the delusion that I didn't have to do any of the hard work. I could just wake up, live however I wanted and still be "saved". The more that I've lived, the more that this notion proves itself to be the farthest from the truth. Life didn't start really turning around for me until I looked for my Heavenly Father on my own. That didn't happen until I was thoroughly struggling. I mean, in all aspects of life. Mentally, emotionally, physically...everything was falling apart and that was when I decided its time to do the heavy lifting. It was time to save myself. I got involved within a church that I truly loved, opened up my bible, made connections with sisters in faith that helped me navigate my own journey and have continued to talk, cry to, plead, anything needed to my God and when I tell you it's saved me?! I couldn't be more blunt. My faith looks a lot different from those memes you see on social media, or hear being preached about from Mike Todd (and those like him) but it is mines and something I know without a shadow of a doubt has protected and guided me throughout my life. Faith is having complete trust in someone/something. My complete trust is in the fact that I am saved only by God's grace and that He has given His only son up to forgive me of my sins. This may not be what faith is to you or others. You might think this entire paragraph is unrelatable and that is okay! The only thing I hope that you get from this is that having faith is powerful and it can pull you out of situations you once believed you had no return from. Whatever faith you may have in whatever it is you may have it in, if it works for you then stick to it and continue to pour into it. Life is very difficult to navigate without FAITH (personal opinion) so give yourself the best chance and just have faith in whatever brings you the will to continue, to succeed, to be your best self. You deserve that!

My evolution over the course of my life has been astronomical! I mean, I am thoroughly surprised at who I am today knowing where it is I started from. The ability to evolve and change over time is something that I'm not sure many of us cherish as much as we should. There is so much change that occurs in our lifetime and celebrating the small victories sometimes gets lost in the sauce. I've noticed that it's the small victories that keep me consistent and wanting to keep going. Clapping for myself when I recognize I've responded in a healthier manner than I have before provides such a sweet feeling that I want to experience it over and over. Evolution of myself is something I'll always be grateful for because it's not easy! Its not something that happens over night. It's not something that is popular amongst the masses (if it was, everyone would be doing it and the toxic traits of others would become less and less instead of routine but I digress). This is something to celebrate and something to be grateful for because it means that improvement is possible and in my opinion, improvement is something worth achieving. If this isn't something you believe is worth the effort, instead...what is? Asking ourselves the hard questions is the only way we will ever truly know where we stand in our own evolution journey. Are you at a stand still? Are you happy with where/who you are? Why or why not? How can you change that if you want too? Evolution is something that I'll always keep at the forefront of how I operate because I choose not to be stagnate. I choose to be in constant motion, moving forward to better improve my being, always. This mindset isn't something I've always had. It is something that has developed over time with life experiences. If this isn't important to you, than don't sweat it! We aren't all lucky enough to be right where it is we have always wanted and have no desire to adjust. That, in my opinion is a great place to be. I do hope that I arrive there at least once in my life. Contentment is what I'd call it. The season I'm in, requires me to be uncomfortable so that is where I'm at and where I'll stay until I'm ready. Until then, I'm grateful for the evolution! So grateful!

Acknowledging three things I'm grateful for everyday has really helped start this self-awareness and improvement journey I've been on for some time now. I started off slow and steady and now, it's as if everyday I wake up a new version of myself and I enjoy looking at her in the mirror, watching her grow and chase after life! My relationship is improving with every day that goes by, I am more self-aware of things that I know are toxic and not in my (or others) best interest, I am less defensive (still working on this) when corrected on my words/actions, I am less worried about things I cannot change and more relaxed with moving at a slower pace instead of being in such a rush, I don't beat myself up if I don't achieve every task I set for myself but instead acknowledge what I have done. There are a lot of things that are different about me that I am truly excited about! The only thing I always think about is why I didn't start this sooner. Had I done so, I always think of all the situations I may have been able to avoid. I know though that those situations needed to happen because they've added to this journey and without them, there is no telling where I would have ended up. I hope that this gives you some sort of warm feeling inside about all the things you should be congratulating yourself on! I hope you recognize all the things, people, situations you could show gratitude toward. I hope that over time, you are able to shift your negative thoughts to positive and even if its not everyday, every situation...if its majority of them or if you are attempting and putting forth the effort...that is a win in itself!

Looking at a glass half full instead of a glass half empty is really a powerful thing!